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The All @$%*&@! team

Posted 11:21 AM ET | Comments 17
K. Lee has been doing an excellent series of blogs regarding the Sens all time team, and a lot of people have followed suit and posted their own all time teams full of the best players. It got me thinking that yeah, a team with Lecavlier, Crosby and Heatley would be nice, but it's been done. Therefore, I've decided to come up with the team that would draw the most penalty minutes and be the most hated and vile spectacle on the ice since the days of the Chiefs.

So, here is my list of the best "disturbers" in the NHL. The anger level in me rises just thinking about it.

For criteria, I'm only using current players. Pardon my biases if they do pop up, trying to keep them under control. I'm not talking fighters here eithe by the way. I'm probably going to miss a few names so if you have any additions please feel free to comment. I thought about putting names like Bertuzzi and Holmstrom on there (Holmstrom just for how good he is at bothering goalies and defencemen) but in the end decided to leave them off.

Neil, Chris - Ask a Sabres fan and they'll tell you why
Cooke, Matt - Is good at what he does.
Perry, Corey - Still convinced the reason that Luongo missed some of that playoff overtime was a Perry slash on his forearm.
Ott, Steve - Bangs, hits etc. Oddly enough, ex Windsor Spitfire number 2.
Tootoo, Jordin - Goes out and runs people, good at what he does though.
Cam Janssen - I tried not to include strictly fighters, but I figured the Kaberle incident was reason enough to include him. (Ex Spitfire number 3.)
Ruutu, Jarkko - He can just look at somebody and they'll be off their game.
Avery, Sean - do I need to explain?
Armstrong, Colby - Has a knack for casually bumping goaltenders. Getting better under the tutelage of J. Ruutu.
Peters, Andrew- More of a fighter BUT, if you fight a goalie you can be on the list.
Tucker, Darcy - Has actually become less of a disturber over time as he's been relied on to score goals for the Leafs. Probably the most hated person on ice according to Sens fans.
Simon, Chris- after his season ended, a bidding war ensued for his services between the NY Islanders and Northland Lumberjacks.

Pronger, Chris - Hugely talented but can throw the occasional dirty play out there with the best of them. Also managed to piss off all of Edmonton and Ottawa within a year. THAT is talent.
Exelby, Garnet
Orpik, Brooks THese two are capable of throwing out some pretty senseless moves. Toronto fans will be better able to explain this than me.
Sutton, Andy. Big, mean, what's with the amount of Thrashers? (current or ex.)
Hatcher, Derian: Just for being a Hatcher.
Chelios, Chris; exhibit A; 1 hotel room in Nagano. Exhibit B; see the only guy I remember seeing skip the team handshakes.

Goalies: Emery - Eat a cockroach, fight a tough guy, slash a guy in the face=the list.
Backup - Belfour: Still active until he officialy leaves. Will offer millions to not get arrested.

honourable mention; Havlat, Martin. One of the most skilled guys around, also kicked a guy in the crotch. Not a true $%&@ disturber but, that's why he only gets an honourable mention.*

There you have my team. One can only imagine the poor referees who would have to do their games and the amount of skirmishes they'd have to break up. I'm sure I left some people off, just can't remember at the moment. If you have any additions or substractions, feel free to let me know.

*(usage of term honourable is done so loosely.)
points to the first person who posts: "you should have just written [insert team name here]"
Filed Under:   Pens   Sens   Avery   Leafs   Thrashers   NHL  
August 22, 2007 12:19 PM ET | Delete
Tootoo, Jordin - Goes out and runs people, good at what he does though.Wooooo! ex Wheat King! He was excellent in junior, 80 point seasons!
August 22, 2007 12:22 PM ET | Delete
It's amazing how good some of these guys are skill wise, yet completely change their games at the NHL level. Except maybe Janssen, he would step out on the ice for Windsor (then Guelph) skate full tilt into somebody and then get in a fight. Obvious fan favourite.
August 22, 2007 12:26 PM ET | Delete
How about Brendan Witt??? Wouldn't want to run into him in a dark alley!!!
August 22, 2007 12:41 PM ET | Delete
What about Ryan Smyth. He sits in front of the goalies and when the shot comes he hits the knob of the goalies stick.
August 22, 2007 1:01 PM ET | Delete
haha...nice post.
August 22, 2007 1:16 PM ET | Delete
Ryan Smyth is one of the classiest guys who plays the game right. He works hard, leads and is pretty much everything right with hockey. No way he makes this list :P I haven't seen Witt play a hole lot but from what I know if him, perhaps he can replace Hatcher?
August 22, 2007 1:42 PM ET | Delete
You should of just written the Toronto Maple Leafs. Nice blog, mob.. lol I like the pestiness and dirtiness of it! :D Why Darcy Tucker!? He's not thhhaaatttt bbaaddd.... :D
August 22, 2007 1:46 PM ET | Delete
I had actually written that down, then decided it was too obvious (and the Thrashers would have been a better answer but I don't really have anything against them) so I offered points instead. Congratulations, you win!
August 22, 2007 2:04 PM ET | Delete
I'd add an honorable mention at the very least to Derek Roy.
August 22, 2007 3:20 PM ET | Delete
GREAT post! :) ...and I love me some Steve Ott! He's a pistol. Totally on board with Crazy Eddie too. He should publish his personal collection of mugshots. The one from Dallas is great. He's schnockered up good! LOL
August 22, 2007 3:33 PM ET | Delete
Steve Ott went played for the Spitfires and I believe is from Windsor Ontario. My highschool hockey coach tried to use him as an example to inspire us, so he told us about the time Steve Ott told his teacher that he didn't have to do his homework because he was going to play in the NHL. I'm not sure if it was supposed to be about dedication, but why in hell would you tell a story about not doing your homework when you're a teacher? I thought about Derek Roy but didn't really know where he fit in. I also tried to leave personal bias out so my thinking was that his inclusion would most likely be based on bias (considering I'm a Sens fan.)
August 22, 2007 8:40 PM ET | Delete
Wicked Mob! Great fun to read.
August 22, 2007 11:21 PM ET | Delete
I'd give props to Chris Kunitz too...Ya gotta call a guy that yanks on someone's hair during a fight a disturber...
August 23, 2007 2:36 AM ET | Delete
Briere deserves at least a mention... he speared Ovechkin in the balls for crying out loud!also... another guy deserving of a mention is this dude who shot a puck at the other team's captain... hmm... who was that again? :P
August 23, 2007 10:22 AM ET | Delete
Where's Alfredsson?
August 23, 2007 10:44 AM ET | Delete
How about the a team of non current players to play this team? Scott StevensTie DomiEsa Tikkanen Those are my sugguestions
August 23, 2007 12:07 PM ET | Delete
Alfie is on the all time Sens team. Briere... compare Briere to Avery, then ask if you can really count him? I could count Ovechkin or Perezhogin but 1 isolated incident doesn't really beat out years of being a jackass.
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