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Canada, AB • Canada •

Flames news!

Posted 10:20 AM ET | Comments 6
Flames have offered the Los Angeles Kings Olli Jokinen for a bag of pucks and their water boy, apparently the Kings are unwilling to make this deal as they think their bag of pucks will find the back of the net eventually more than Jokinen and the water boy at least shows up to work and doesn't have a gay biker handlebar mustache.

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In other news the Flames have signed a pylon to play center, they simply attach it to a rope around Iginla's waist, it acts in the same manner the centers do now, generally useless and cumbersome... while being much cheaper.


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The locker room was a disaster zone last night following a 2-0 loss to a non playoff team, apparently the team was given notice that because they can't even score one goal they are not going top be given their "participation" ribbons at the end of the season. On the plus side, a bunch of fat kids coming in last at county fair races will now have "participation" ribbons given to them... the Flames scouts will be there hoping to sign the slowest.

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Paramedics were called to the Saddeldome but were perplexed to find themselves undermanned, they were not prepared for 30 men all choking at once.


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Darryl Sutter has stated that he thinks this team as it stands can play out of this funk. In other news Ostriches called Sutter and asked that he stop stealing their shtick.

S>O>
Filed Under:   Flames   Sutter   Jokinen  
January 26, 2010 10:23 AM ET | Delete
hahahaha , entertaining. - Chicago Irish Matt
January 26, 2010 11:04 AM ET | Delete
Perfect summary of the last month and a half!
January 26, 2010 11:37 AM ET | Delete
Funny to call the Blues a non playoff team. Yes by the standings they currently are not in the playoffs, the last time I looked the season is far from over. However if the other teams ahead of them continue to play like the "Burnouts", even Columbus may make the playoffs. Don't you love parity.
January 26, 2010 2:29 PM ET | Delete
Sorry Buggles, it's actually taking aim at the recent excuse of losing to chicago and S.J. not a shot at the Blues who clearly were better last night.
January 26, 2010 6:14 PM ET | Delete
your so stupid they are great players
January 27, 2010 2:20 AM ET | Delete
haha awesome.
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