What would happen if the NHL had no off-season? Can you imagine the freedom, husbands? You could watch the TV as much as you liked. Think about it, we would not have to listen to whiny kids ever. It would be your wife's job to take care of the kids all year during hockey.
The only problem is the cost of a bodyguard to protect you from your wife killing you. Who would you pick as you bodyguard? I thought that this week I would pick my favorite enforcers. I will give you my top 5 and let you pick which you would like for your bodyguard.
First let me lay down some ground rules. Actually, let's make it as no rules. How do you feel about anarchy? So without any rules, you may not know too many of my picks. That is because I am an old fart.
Dave “Tiger” Williams
Tiger was one of the best fighters and enforcers over the years in Toronto. He is the NHL's career leader in penalty minutes. He had a number of seasons with over 300 regular season penalty minutes. He will always be known for his skate after he scored a goal. I will always remember him protecting the big guns in Toronto, threatening to beat whoever's face if they crossed the line.
Dave “the Hammer” Schultz
The Hammer was the ultimate fighter during the big bad Philly years. I remember a huge fight between him and Gillies during the playoffs. It was one of the best fights I have ever seen. And then there was the scene with them shaking hands at the end of the series. He was nasty; a terrific fight who always went to the wall for his teammates.
Stan “Bulldog” Jonathon
The Bulldog was one of the toughest enforcers in the League. He had a chip on his shoulder, and never really got the respect he deserved. He never backed down from a challenge. Whether he won or not, he never cheated.
Derek “Boogeyman” Boogaard
Boogeyman Boogaard was probably the strongest enforcer in the NHL this past season. I am not sure I saw him lose a tussle this past year. He is big and has the strength of an ox. He cannot be moved easily, and protected his stars. He earned his paycheque.
Jody “Hedgehog” Shelly (really?)
Shelley played 36 games and got 78 minutes in penalties this last year He was no angel, coming out on the ice just looking for trouble. It wasn't the fact that he was looking, it was the fact that he was smiling when he found it. He is one man I would not want to meet in a dark alley somewhere.
There are my top 5 picks for your protection if hockey became an all year sport. Truth be told, you would probably be needing two or three bodyguards. Let's be truthful now, we all aggravate our wives just a little during hockey season.
So who is your enforcer?